Ruta Tangiiau Mave. Photo: CI NEWS
Fairytales tell our children to fear the wicked stepmother. Reality says they should fear the stepfather, uncles, grandfathers and friends of the family. Not all men are rapists and paedophile’s but most rapists and paedophiles are men. It must end today, with the women, writes Ruta Mave.
Sadly, there are women to blame for the rampant misbehaviour of men in our political business and sporting fields who are raping and abusing not only our economic system but more importantly our emotional and spiritual sanctity. Blame – because they remain silent.
Women you don’t deserve to be abused, beaten or cheated on. You have not asked for it, your behaviour does not invite it in, but your continued silence perpetuates it.
Men are getting away with rape and violence every day because women do not report them. They are not reporting him because the system does not support her. The system is being raped and abused by the same men in power. It has to end today, forever.
If you don’t report them, then you support them.
Think about it ladies, when you allow them to do it to you, you give them the permission to freely go and do it to another sister, mother, aunty, niece, granddaughter. Report it now.
I am not talking about running to the neighbours every time he hits you or cheats on you, making admissions, asking for help, only to go back to him for another beating, another cheating. They say ‘leave him’ but you keep living with him. Time to grow up, he will not change. You have to change. If you do not change your life then you are choosing that life.
Neighbours next time she cries abuse call the police – report it, the cycle must end with us.
Results from a 2014 survey of 458 females from 15 – 64 years old showed how bad the abuse is in this country. 59 per cent said they had suffered physical violence, 11 percent sexual violence that is 70 per cent, 30 per cent suffered both. Across all ages they said they had experienced this abuse before they were 15. National council of women president recently said eight percent reported they experienced physical/sexual violence before age 15. The important word is “reported” The survey was anonymous, but not reported until ten years later. We find out, we do nothing, we allow it.
Everyone is weighing in on this subject since the sentencing of a 57 year old man to 14 years jail. Why now? Why this case? Why not the one from Palmerston Island? Why not the one with the taxi driver? Why not the girl who came from the outer islands for school and was raped in her bed? The girl who was not allowed to read her victim statement to her uncle.
Why now? Well, we have a new judge, QC that certainly helps. If you think 14 years is not enough it is the highest given by a judge in a long time, this is a positive. Is it because the defence lawyer found his heart? Certainly, no heart was present to hear the victims in other cases, where somehow it was always their fault, they asked for it and the abuser was innocent.
Maybe because there have been so many and there are many still waiting to be heard, that he can no longer stomach hearing anymore? Maybe he realised this could have been his grandchild? Whatever the reason for the commenting let this be finally turned into action.
Father’s brother’s uncle’s out there, stop chanting bros before hoes. Protecting your pride and reputation above believing your own child is the sharpest knife to their hearts and soul.
Start listening to your sister, your daughter, your friend. Lion up for the females in your pride.
When it all comes out, you and your ego will wear the stain of shame more than the victim, when everyone learns you knew and did nothing to protect her.
Defence lawyers you may have a job to do, but when you knowingly put a violent abusive man back on the streets because of your cleverness, then you are complicit in their next offense. Remember each time you allow them to walk free of conviction then they will walk amongst us where your own daughters walk, your family and friends. Why do you risk them?
Woman, we need you to speak up. If not you then who? If not now then when? Do you have a daughter, sister, aunty, friend? Would you want your abuse to happen to them? The system is broken, but no amount of denial, shame or running away is going to fix it, or stop it from happening to someone you love and care for.
God will judge you all as an accessory to these crimes for saying nothing.
