A MUM said she receives online hate for going on holiday without her two kids to “keep sane.”
Ania Grabowska said travelling is her true passion and a way of life.
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She faces many challenges as a mother of two boys, Kuba and Maciek, who have autism.
The 43-year-old, who works as a teacher, said she often whizzes off somewhere exotic to avoid going “mentally crazy”, especially when dealing with the challenges of her son’s condition.
Ania shared: “Travel is a huge mental escape for me.
“It allows me to recharge my batteries and become someone else for a moment, and that’s invaluable to me.
“I travel to avoid going mentally crazy; it’s my way of dealing with stress.
“Life can be tough. I have my own worries about Maciek, but also those everyday, ordinary problems we all know.
“Travel recharges me with so much energy that when I return, I can once again fight for Maciek and for a better world for him.”
Ania said she receives a lot of online hate due to her need sometimes to fly off somewhere alone.
“I hear all sorts of comments, some absurd and sometimes downright malicious,” she said.
“People often don’t understand that when you have a sick child, you can and should take care of yourself to be in a position to help.
“I’ve heard that I’m ‘irresponsible’ and that I’m ‘abandoning my children’ because I’m going away, completely untrue and hurtful judgements.
“It’s these trips that give me the strength and peace to be a good mother.
“Sometimes people fail to understand that support and time for myself are the foundation for loving and helping even better.
Ania, who lives in Olkusz, between Krakow and Katowice in Poland, added: “You have to be a little selfish to avoid going crazy.”
However, Ania said her two boys still get to travel regularly with her too.
Her solo trips, sometimes including her partner Marek, are in addition to as many family vacations as she can manage.
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She explained: “I think it’s also incredibly valuable for the children to travel and experience other cultures and places, learn the language in natural settings, and gain memories that will stay with them for a lifetime.
“This is especially important for Maciek, who thrives in an environment of change and novelty.
I’ve heard that I’m ‘irresponsible’ and that I’m ‘abandoning my children’ because I’m going away, completely untrue and hurtful judgements
Ania Grabowska
“If we have a happy mother, the children are happy, that’s why it’s important to think positively about ourselves and find time to pursue our passions.
“I’m self-employed and have two months of vacation, which I try to make the most of.
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“My teaching budget isn’t a fortune, but it’s enough to fulfil my travel dreams thanks to saving, planning, and buying tickets in advance.
“Travel is a strength and inspiration for the entire family.
“I travel most often with my partner and my children, mainly with Maciek.
“He’s not content with just packing; he wants to fly right away!
“Kuba, my eldest son, also enjoys travelling, albeit in a more leisurely way.
She added: “The most important thing is that everyone is happy, and so am I.”
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When it comes to destinations, Ania has already travelled to the far corners of the world.
She said: “I’ve visited the Dominican Republic, Zanzibar, the US, Bali, and almost every country in Europe.
“And I’m planning a weekend trip to Dubai, South Africa, in November.
“For Christmas, I’d like to fly to Egypt with Maciek.
“Next year, I dream of Sri Lanka and the Seychelles, although the final decision will be made later.”
She added, “Good planning and saving are key. I buy my tickets in December for the summer vacation because that’s when they have the lowest prices.
“I have my own struggling teaching finances, but that doesn’t stop me from fulfilling my dreams.”
How to survive six weeks of school summer holidays
IF you are struggling with the six week summer holidays, you’ve come to the right place…
BATTLING BOREDOM: Despite hours of activities and playdates, if your kids are already complaining there’s nothing to do, parenting expert Liat Hughes Joshi says: “Don’t feel you have to organise every second of the holidays. Kids benefit from boredom and learn to make their own fun.
“Boredom can trigger creative and imaginative play but you need to encourage kids to get used to not being told how to spend their time.
“Ride out the pleas of boredom. Counter it with comments such as, ‘What do you think you could do?’ and maybe have a list of ‘I’m bored’ activity ideas on the fridge.”
SCREEN OVERLOAD: It’s tempting during the holidays to rely on a digital babysitter but don’t let them gawp their whole summer away in front of a screen.
Liat says: “It’s unfair to expect older kids to power down but it’s important to set some ground rules.
“Set family tech rules together. If you’re often distracted by your phone, follow the rules too. Maybe tell the kids they aren’t allowed any screen time until they’ve done set chores, some exercise, or a board game.
“Are there times when you’d like to ban screens completely? Perhaps during dinner or when they have friends over to visit.
“Tech is a battleground for parents, but you have to set boundaries. Stand firm and be prepared to be unpopular.”
TOO MUCH TOGETHERNESS: You love your kids, but being with them 24/7 can be exhausting. Do not feel guilty if you need a bit of downtime.
Liat says: “If you’re juggling work and household tasks as well as occupying the kids, it’s normal to start feeling overwhelmed or jaded and in need of some peace.
“If you can’t afford or don’t want to send your kids to all-day camps, look for free kids’ workshops so you can get on with jobs or have a break for a couple of hours.
“Seeking a spell of quiet every now and then doesn’t make you a bad parent — in fact it will probably make you more positive and enthusiastic when you are with the kids.”
SCHEDULING CONFLICT: Schedules can go out the window during holidays, but late nights and early mornings can mean tired and unhappy children.
Dr Tamara Bugembe, paediatrician and founder of Helperbees.co.uk says: “Children get grumpy, test boundaries and become challenging when routines are broken.
“Sticking to some kind of routine during the holidays is a good idea.
“We release hormones at different times of the day and when regular meal times and bed times are broken, it causes dips and peaks in mood.
“Holidays are about having fun but an early night once or twice a week will make everyone happier.”
EXCESS ENERGY: Make sure kids get out in the fresh air to tire them out — and make them healthier and happier.
Dr Bugembe says: “Sunshine also tops up vital vitamin D levels which helps improve bone strength and energy levels in children. Our levels run low in winter so let the kids stock up in warmer weather.
“Letting them run around in shorts and a T-shirt is the best way to top up. Make sure they’re wearing sun cream, get outside and have fun.
“Encourage them to try healthy habits such as cycling and walking. They’ll hopefully get hooked and want to carry them on when the weather gets colder.”
